Friday, March 25, 2016

Whom do you love more…and who loves you more…

As kids, we face this question, and then, kids are found to face this question from us, the “whom,” relating to myriad relationships. But primary is that with parents, as either the parents ask or others, “Whom do you love more…and who loves you more…mom or dad?” And then, expectant are the looks, difficult to discern, who, is the kid!

The question could be apparently innocuous, and presented playfully, in joyous, and celebrating joyous, circumstances. Yet, it is far from so…as, what meets the eyes physical is an immeasurable fraction of that immeasurable whole that is visible to inner eyes, and waits for its visibility to the physical ones. More on it…but, before that, over to the answer that the kids are found to forward (as I too did)…call forth: Musing…pondering…it is an answer in favor of none as is in favor of both, “Mom and dad, both…” extended with a smile. Then, the child is cajoled and coaxed: “C’mon… It cannot be so. You must be loving one of them more, one of them must be loving you more. Shall give you a chocolate. Now, tell…the truth…”

If only we know the Truth…

The kid stands the ground, no nudges, enticements, able to budge the kid…and gets the label, the kid, of “diplomat,” “intelligent”…and the question-hour session comes to a close with laughter… But the laughter and the precursors are not exactly registered as joy, as they imprint the psyche with confusion, that comes to haunt and taunt, quite unbeknownst…

If only we know the Truth, this question, in the first place, wouldn’t be extended…

As far as the kid is concerned, it could very well be that the kid, still hasn’t forgotten the Truth…Eternal…its connection with the Source…Love…Divine, and thus, knows Love Is…Love isn’t measurable. That, when it is Love, there is no point in trying to quantify or label it. These very attempts though tempt, but when lured, sure is one to experience a tortured mind…experiencing the ruptures in the mind…those conflicts…confusions… At the same time, the kid could be deciding in favoring of none by deciding in favor of both, simply because by so doing it perceives that it would be pleasing both…or it wouldn’t be incurring the wrath of none… Yet, such questions, go on to imprint the psyche with people-pleasing tendencies, choking thereby the passage that transmits the authenticity, choking the experience of authenticity, as sought is not authenticity, the consensus thought to be the determinant of one’s life and living. Besides, such questions, present the difficulty to the kids, which, apparently, might not be perceptible: To choose between the two loved ones…discriminate… Love, the Ultimate Healer, Binder, is called forth to divide…and that, is not Love, as Love would never ask to choose, Love would never divide….

The agonies, that kids of separated families undergo, bear testimony to the heart-rending effects of this superficial reception and extension of Love. So, do we have to put forth this question to the kids?

Love is the very verve, reference of life, and doesn’t play out as preferences. Love is God, The Source, the Universal Energy of Creation, expressed, and is Unconditional. And when Love is presented or experienced as “degrees,” as conditional, the experience is of what Love is not. Each expression of Love is a unique hue, incomparable, and in asking to choose, lost is the experience of the essential essence that Love is…and experienced is pain…and it is Rumi, as always, relaying, with absolute clarity, the Truth of Love…the Sole Reality: “That which is false troubles the heart, but truth brings tranquility.”

So, shall we allow the kids to enjoy Love, enjoy being loved, enjoy the Ultimate and Sole Security, instead of asking such questions which, in the long run, turn out detrimental to growth, mental and all-round? Or would we keep on running on the same track, projecting ourselves neither as adults nor as kids, experiencing a “loose connection,” a dissonance with our very own essence…innocence…Love in form that we are, loving not truly the Love in form that we are, unaware of Love…unaware of Who We Are? As we sow so we reap. As we propagate, so and that, we grow…

Every time is put forth the question, “Whom do you love more…who loves you more…” brought to the fore is the unawareness of our very Core.

So? Many a time, a question, in answer to a question, has been found to lead to the answer, which, earlier we ignored, yet, can no more!

Sushmita,
March 25, 2016


P.S. Thanked is The Speaking Tree, the print edition, of March 20, 2016 for leading to the quote by Rumi.